Merry Christmas

From my amazing new Christmas sweater! 

Remove "5 Reasons to Date a Girl with an Eating Disorder" - Make a Difference, not a Joke

Sign the Petition!

Please, do me a favor and do not google search "5 Reasons to Date a Girl with an Eating Disorder". Don't give the author the satisfaction of another hit on their post. It is disgusting. I'm usually down for a satirical post, but tone is a difficult thing to infer when reading text on the internet. Writers can pass off lies as the truth, and opinion as law.

A Delta Phi Epsilon sister wrote the following letter in response, along with a petition to remove the article. Please read this editorial and share the petition link below.

To Whom It May Concern:

I’m not entirely sure your intentions in writing and electronically publishing the article titled “5 Reasons to Date a Girl with an Eating Disorder”, but I am requesting you delete it immediately. Up to 24 million people of all ages and genders suffer from an eating disorder today. Whether or not the article is serious, whether or not it’s a satirical commentary on how unattractive eating disorders are, there are real girls out there that look at themselves in the mirror everyday and hate themselves. Have you ever seen a girl stick her fingers down her throat because she feels like she ate too much at dinner? I have. Have you ever seen a girl with cuts on her wrist because she doesn’t understand why she’s still living? I have. Have you ever met a girl who stopped eating for a weekend because she thinks no one will ever find her beautiful if she’s not skinny? I have.

While you may think your article is witty, maybe humorous, and that your article only reaches a certain audience, you are most certainly wrong. It’s people like you and your publication that defame real journalists that actually have things of importance to share with the world, rather than articles like the one I am referring to above or “24 Signs She’s a Slut”, “20 Things Women Do That Should Be Shamed, Not Celebrated”, just to name a few. These articles are not fun, they are not of any kind of public importance, but merely sad attempts for you to gain some sort of sick and twisted following composed entirely on male bigotry.

As a member of an organization that works to promote positive body image for women, I want to tell you that statements like, "while they may have a “distorted body image” on the inside, that usually means staying trim and fit on the outside," are not remotely humorous because there are girls out there that will believe every word of this article. They’ll continue to believe that it is okay to keep purging and starving themselves because there are idiots like you in the world that glamourize eating disorders.

Please remove this article, its mere publication is a disgusting reminder to sane people that idiots like you exist in the world, the idiots that will perpetuate the popularity of eating disorders, which is something that I strive to help stop.

Sincerely,

An Emotional Eater

Sign the Petition!

Remember you are beautiful. Love, and be well.

Sorority Crafting Sundays: Sorority Mug

This craft is courtesy of the kitchen at the Phi Lambda Chapter Lodge at Emory University. Thank you for letting me use your oven.

1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. 

2. DRAW! Create any design you want! For my craft, I was creating mugs to celebrate my Alumnae Association chartering, so I drew the state of GA in purple. 

3. Let the Sharpie outline dry for 1 minute so it doesn't smudge. 

4. Add your favorite details. I recommend using your sorority colors, but... duh, of course I would recommend that. 

5. Once the oven is preheated, stick those mugs in the oven for 35-40 minutes. This should make the Sharpie designs set in to the ceramic. 

6. When the time is up, let your mug cool, sip, and enjoy!

Engage U Kennesaw Edition

An incredible perk of being a Delta Phi Epsilon sister is opportunity for continued growth as a leader within our organization. Our International Headquarter hosts regional conferences each semester open to all sisters to attend to sharpen their leadership skills. Engage U was dreamed up after several years of hosting DLC (District Leadership Conference) biannually. DLC would be held over a weekend, limiting the number of sisters able to attend because it was an expensive commitment. Engage U was born, meant to engage the members throughout the year in a way that is innovative, enlightening, and cost effective. 

Fall 2013, International Headquarters selected Kennesaw State University to host Engage U. I was super excited when the announcement happened, as it is my alma mater and hometown. I couldn't wait to host my friends from IHQ in my home state! 

At this conference, women from the Georgia chapters and some women from Illinois and Texas joined together to learn from alumnae leading a myriad of presentations throughout the day. I joined my Phi Lambda Chapter President for several of the morning sessions. We learned about the Chapter Assessment Program, Values Based Recruitment, and Risk Management. It was wonderful to be there with my President as she was exposed to new ideas with which to lead the chapter towards great things. 

After lunch, I had the honor of leading a Chapter Advisory Board session. We discussed everything from what is required of a Chapter Advisor or Advisory Board Member, to how to place women in these positions. We spent the majority of the time fielding questions as a group from the collegiate women and other advisors in attendance. Of the women in the room, the level of support from advisors ran the gambit. One chapter has two Chapter Advisors, neither of which was able to be as active as the chapter feels they need. An advisor from another chapter is serving remotely from across the country. Several challenges were presented in both cases, and I found it really interesting how the group worked to field the questions and concerns of the women in the room. That's something that is so incredible about being in a sisterhood as strong as ours. We may have never met each other before Engage U, but when faced with questions and challenges we dropped the questions of our own and came up with collective solutions. Pretty powerful stuff in only a 40 minutes session. 

To close our day, I lead a keynote discussion about the importance of the Senior to Alumna transition. My key take aways from this discussion were that seniors are really the hardest audience in your chapter. They are set in their ways, don't like change, and can easily become disenchanted with the entire experience. The women who stick it out to senior year need to be rewarded for the legacy they are leaving behind. Engage these women throughout the year, and have their final sorority experiences be topnotch. If they leave the collegiate chapter with good memories they will be more likely to return to help with Recruitment, Homecoming, Greek Week, volunteer for your international organization, or even make monetary contributions to your chapter or foundations.

Here are some ideas for engaging your senior members throughout the year:

• Senior Celebratory Chapter Meeting - Give the seniors special seats in chapter, decorate "We Love Our Seniors" signs, and generally just love on 'em!
• Senior/Alumnae Mixer - Get your chapter alumnae together with your seniors to talk about their opportunities to stay involved in the sorority beyond graduation.
• "Senior of the Week" - Highlight a senior every week on social media, and give them a small gift at chapter. 
• Senior Retreat - Plan a weekend retreat for seniors only so they can have one last HOO-RAH!
• Cap Decorating Party - Bring on the glitter-glue! Provide the supplies for seniors to decorate their graduation caps. 
• Resume/Cover Letter workshop - Talk to your career services office on your campus about hosting a workshop for graduating members where they go over their resumes. 

Sorority Mug Supplies

If you are like me, you want everything your own to remind you of the sorority. When I heat up my hot chocolate, I want my marshmallows to float in a cup of DPhiE love. Okay, I recognize I may be a rare breed of woman, but what's wrong with that?

This weekend, we will make Sorority Mugs. These are a great (and inexpensive) Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa/Birthday/President's Day present, and easier than painting a canvas. 

Here's what you'll need:

• Ceramic mug (bought mine at the Dollar Store)
• Sharpies
• Oven
• OVEN MIT! 

Happy crafting!

All the Pieces Fit

Don't you love a good puzzle? I know I do. Okay, I haven't put one together since middle school, when we were putting together a picture of the world made up of thousands of tiny pictures, but still it's exciting. When you find that middle piece that looks like every other piece, only every other piece was just slightly off, that final piece is the holy grail.

That's how I feel right now at this moment. The chapter I advise for has an Advisory Board of four super qualified, out-spoken, die hard DPhiE's. This seems really awesome, until all of four of us are responding to your emails, giving you very similar advice, and asking you to be accountable to all of us at the same time.

Luckily, for this chapter and the advisors' own sanity, we are blessed with the leadership of our International Headquarters. These incredibly brilliant and talented women have developed a system for Chapter Advisory Boards that divide and support each officer in the Leadership Team. We are moving towards a CAB model, assigning two LT members to one advisor. We haven't discussed the transition with the entire LT, but we did float the idea to a few of them on Sunday and they couldn't have been more on board for a fair and equal division of our time and efforts.

The past few days, my fellow advisors have already been taking on responsibilities they will have starting next semester, and really proving to me that this transition is for the best.

All of the pieces are starting to fit. I can't wait to see the wonderful things this group will accomplish.

Sorority Crafting Sundays: Sorority Snuggly Heating Pad

Grab a box of tissues, your greatest cold remedy, and your sewing machine and let's get started.

     1. Measure the length and width of your heating pad by laying your bag of rice on top of the fabric and cutting around the excess. 

     2. Layer your cut piece of fabric over your second piece and cut it down to match the size. 

     3. Stack your two pieces of fabric with the right sides facing each other. 

     4. Using your sewing machine, sew 3 of the 4 sides shut. 

     5. Flip the pocket right side out. 

     6. Measure the entire bag of rice. I didn't have a full bag of rice, personally, so I made due with what I had in my pantry. Divide the rice into three equal measurements. 

     7. Measure your pocket and divide it into 3 equal pieces. Mark these sections. 

     8. Pour in 1/3 of your rice and sew the first third of your pocket closed. 

     9. Pour in the 2nd 1/3 of rice into the pocket and pin it closed. Sew along the pin line, being careful not to spill any rice into your machine. I totally did and now I'm very nervous what will happen next time I use it. 

     10. Pour your final third of rice in the final third of your pocket. Pin the fabric closed on the edge of the opening, and sew shut. 

Sorority Snuggly Heating Pad Supplies

Sorority Snuggly Heating Pad
I have spent the past week sniffling, sneezing, coughing, and complaining. My Fall Cold is upon me, and I have felt so gross all week. With very little free time, I had to soldier through the week with a smile on my face at work, then crash on my couch every night. When this weekend hit I thought to myself, "I just want a nice warm blanket and a good night sleep."

You know what helps me sleep? A heating pad on my neck. It makes just about everything feel better. So, I set off to make one in my favorite sorority colors: purple and gold.

Let's make one together and all treat ourselves to a mini spa. Melt away the discomfort, and do it in style with the Sorority Snuggly Heating Pad.

What you'll need:

• Two pieces of contrasting fabrics in the size you wish your pad to be. 
• Sewing machine
• Bag of uncooked rice
• Straight pins
• Thread
• Scissors
• Measuring tape

Cozy up and get crafty!

Image and Reputation Week: Knees

Halloween is here. The time has come for girls to break out the hooker heels and fishnets and pretend they are going for a "conservative kitten" costume. Let me warn you about your short hemlines:

You are the face of your sorority!

Stepping down from my soapbox... give me a second. 

No matter what day of the year it is, I urge you to remember you are representing your organization 24/7. Halloween, among all of the holidays throughout the year, is one of the most important days to set your reputation. This is a day that is dedicated to costumes, drinking, and dancing while you're in college. Everyone is congregating at parties on campus and off campus. Booze is flowing, and before you know it you are tempted to dance on a table and stick your tongue out like Miley. Well, look how well that turned out for her. Sure she is getting more attention from the media, but is it really the kind of attention you and your sorority deserve? 

Having attended several Halloween parties in my undergrad days, and trying on several slutty costumes, I can attest you will have so much more fun if your butt is not hanging out of your too-short skirt all night. You won't have anything to apologize for in the morning. You won't have unflattering pictures to answer to in the morning. Pictures, I might add, your future employers and your mother will find no matter how hard you try to hide them. 

On every other day of the year, you don't have to think about the cat ears you might wear and how they will clash with your leather hotpants. But you should still keep in mind the clothing you wear and what it says about you. At an interview, for instance, you don't want to show up with your legs hanging out there in all of their glory. Make sure to be conscious of the length of your skirt. Try it on, and practice sitting in it. Practice walking up stairs in it. Make sure it covers all essentials, and I would recommend it touch your knees. 

When you sit in said skirt, whether it is your recruitment outfit or your perfect interview suit, pay attention to what happens when you cross your legs or ankles. Does the skirt get too tight? Does it gap? These are things you will think about in the moment and become distracted by if you don't test it out first. 

Be prepared. Be modest. You'll be more comfortable in the moments that count. 

Image and Reputation Week: Shoulders

"Sit up straight!"

How many times have your heard that from your mom, grandmother, aunt, etc? This harping on your posture is honestly for your own good. As a woman in my mid-twenties I am starting to see why I was told to push my shoulders back and hold my head up.

Its about two things: Confidence and your health.

People, namely women, are looked at as unconfident when they slouch. They are literally caving in, into themselves. When your body is telling you to cave in, it makes it so much harder for you to stand up and impress.

Try sitting up as if you are trying to touch your shoulder blades together, and watch your brain and your body start to wake up. As you talk to your interviewer or a PNM at Recruitment, try turning your shoulders squared towards them. You'll actively engage in conversation far better than you would with bad posture.

Image and Reputation Week: Head

We've all heard the phrase, "she's got a good head on her shoulders." Whenever you hear that, you know someone respects your level-headedness and responsibility. Let's take that saying a step further, shall we? 

As you travel through life, let's be real: your head does the majority of the work. Your head is capable of all 5 senses. It protects that big, beautiful brain of yours. Your ears are there to listen to criticisms, praise, and stories from good friends. Your eyes help you see all the beautiful things about the world. Your mouth can either set you up for success, or get you in trouble. But what is your head saying about you? What first impressions are you giving potential sisters, bosses, and boyfriends? 

The following are my thoughts on how to give your best first impression, focusing only from the neck up. 

Hair

I have curly hair. For the majority of my childhood I could not understand why my hair wouldn't lay flat like the "pretty girls" in school. So, I would brush it over and over until I achieved something that looked like a triangle. Close enough! NOT. 

Clearly, I had some self esteem issues.. and was horribly confused about where my curly hair came from. Embrace the nature of your hair. If you are not blessed with perfect locks, don't spend all your time trying to imitate the same look as the most popular person you know. Spend some time getting to know your hair. What works? What doesn't? (cough cough, brushing out your curls to a delta shape) You don't need to spend a ton of money on special products. Get together with some sisters and play dress up. Its more fun than simply watching TV or going to the same bar you went to last week and the week before. 

People notice crazy hair styles, and its not always a good thing. Don't be a triangle-head or Over-processed Olivia. Spend some quality time getting to know your luscious locks.  

Eyes

Eye contact. Heard of it? Thought so. In interview situations, eye contact is major. When you can't look someone in the eye, they could think several things:

1. This is weird. Why is she being weird?
2. Does she think she's better than me? 
3. Is she lying? Coming up with the right answer?
4. She's embarrassed. 

The list could go on and on. When you're on an interview, or recruiting new members, you don't want your conversation partner to be distracted by your eyes. You want them to be connected because of your eyes. 

Practice with with girls in your bumping group. Don't forget to blink. That is also really creepy. 

Face

Recruitment is not a time to try something new when it comes to make-up. Always try to go for a natural look. You are spending a lot of time face-to-face with a perfect stranger. They don't know your blue eyeshadow is a new hue you're trying out. They think you always look the way you do when they first meet you. Be the best representation of yourself. And that means:

• Dab a little concealer under your eyes to reduce the blue tint from late nights studying. 
• Cover blemishes as best you can with concealer, but don't get crazy. That can come off looking cakey and dark. Everyone gets blemishes, so she'll understand if you have a little break out. 
• If you're not an eye makeup kind of gal, try out a little mascara to help your eyes seem more awake. Recruitment is tiring, and any help looking less like a zombie will be welcome. 
• If you are an eye makeup kind of gal, stick with an eye shadow that goes with your eye color. Blue eyes pop with brown/gold eye shadow. Brown eyes look great with a light purple or gold eye shadow. DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT wear blue eye shadow. This is not the 80's. It won't look as good as you want it to. Sorry, not sorry. 
• Use a pink-hued blush to give yourself a little color on your cheek bones. I revert back to my zombie comment from earlier... you'll want a little more help looking alive. 
• Keep those lips from drying up from all that talking by keeping a small tube of lipgloss in your pocket for in-between recruitment rounds. Not everyone can pull off red lipstick, but I would be willing to bet MOST people can pull off a little shimmery medium pink lip gloss. Try it! 

Beyond the make-up, pay attention to what your face does on its own. Have you heard the term "bitchy resting face"? I know, its horrible. But that doesn't make it untrue. When you are having a short reprieve from talking to PNMs, be careful not to look around the room and scowl. No matter what you and the person next to you are complaining about (my feel hurt, when is this round over? I'm starving!), keep a slight smile glued on your face. Not a scary joker grin, but something that doesn't look like you want to stab someone. Give yourself the opportunity to laugh, smile, giggle, and be generally delighted to be surrounded by your sisters. 

Ears

Do yourself a favor and get out of your head. Be present in your interview or recruitment conversations. You'll be forced to remember details later when you're scoring the girl you spoke to, or if you get called into a second interview for that dream job. You don't want to go blank when you remember back to this one on one conversation. Listen. Actively listen.

Heads, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes...

Knees and toes. Sorry, I couldn't resist!

This Saturday, I'll be hosting an Image/Appearance and Reputation Workshop for the chapter I advise. The Vice President of Recruitment has asked me to speak during their scheduled Recruitment Meeting on the importance of first impressions, and how to dress for a successful recruitment. I realize this could sound incredibly vain and shallow, but hear me out. Appearance is not just how you look, but how you are perceived. Formal Recruitment in its nature is an incredibly shallow process, and first impressions are super important. I'm not dogging your local Panhellenic system, I'm only saying it is a very quick time to talk someone into a very serious commitment.

This week, I will be using this blog as a sounding board for some ideas regarding the workshop. I'm calling it "Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes: How to Give a Great First Impression". I will cover clothing, make-up, attitude, body language, and reputation.

Let me know your thoughts! I want this workshop to be successful for everyone involved. I'm no expert, but I have been through over 10 Recruitments in the past 7 years. I also worked in Human Resources for a year. Hopefully that gives me some credibility.

Sorority Crafting Sundays: Sorority Bow Scarf

Let me say this about knitting a scarf with medium weight worsted yarn: it is not a race, its a marathon. Set aside some serious down time for this project. But, it is absolutely worth the effort! 

     1. Make a slipknot at the start of your purple yarn. 

     2. Cast on an odd number of stitches. For the width of my scarf, I chose 25 stitches. 

     3. Knit to the desired length of your scarf. I worked with the seed stitch for this scarf, alternating knit 1, purl 1 across each row. The odd number of stitches will result in you starting with a knit stitch and ending with a knit stitch. My scarf is 40 inches long. 

     4. Cast off the last row and leave a long tail of yarn at the end. Knot and set aside. 

     5. Tie a slipknot in the start of your yellow yarn. 

     6. Cast on the same number of stitches as your purple scarf. For my bow, I cast on 25 stitches in width. 

     7. Repeat the pattern from #3 (knit 1, purl 1), until you achieve the desired width of your bow. You'll know you have the size bow you want by folding the knit over as you knit and pinching it in the center. My bow is about 14 inches long, 7 inches when folded over. 

     8. Cast off all stitches on your final row, leaving a long tail of yarn. 

     9. Using the long tail of yarn, fold your purple scarf over and stitch the two ends together with a yarn needle. Tie the end off. It should look something like this...

     10. Repeat step #9 on your yellow knit piece. It should look something like this...

     11. One last slipknot, to create the center of the bow. 

     12. Cast on the desired width of the center of your bow, making sure it is an odd number. For my bow, I cast on 5 stitches. 

     13. Knit the seed stitch until you achieve a length that can stretch around the width of the box and scarf. For instance, my bow center piece was 7 inches long. 

     14. Line up your seams. 

     15. Lay your bow piece on the scarf, matching up the seams. 

     16. Using your bow center piece, gather the bow in the center and wrap the long piece around both the bow knit piece and the scarf. 

     17. Turn over the scarf, and stitch the ends of the bow center together, binding the bow and scarf together. It doesn't have to look pretty since it will be on the inside of the scarf. 

You did it! How cute do you feel, you cuddly snowman, you?!